1) Both you and the Columbia AIDS manual note that the risk of AIDS transmission by unprotected cunnilingus is less (at least when the woman's not having her period) than via unprotected anal/vaginal intercourse. What I'd like to know is, how much less? Are there any statistics? Are there any documented cases of AIDS being spread this way? If so, how often does it seem to occur? It's difficult to know whether it makes sense to take my chances unless I know what the chances are.
Also, both you and the manual say transmission can't occur without contact with a mucous membrane. I have another AIDS brochure that says there's at least a small chance the virus could pass through tears around the cuticles of the hand. Is this the case, and if so, how great a risk is there in putting your fingers in somebody's vagina or anus for extended periods?
2) What are the risks of HIV infection for the passive partner of oral sex?