Is it wrong to masturbate with roommate?

Dear straight,

You have a great relationship with a good friend, you're in school, you're able to feel and express affection, and you can clearly consider and communicate your feelings. And sometimes you masturbate with your roommate. You're as normal as a one-dollar bill. In fact, your willingness to reach out for information is evidence that you're able to address your concerns in a healthy way. As long as these acts are consensual among both parties, there's absolutely nothing wrong with what you're doing. 

The fact of the matter is that masturbation is a completely healthy and normal practice, and mutual masturbation is something that many people engage in, whether it's friends, lovers, or any relationship in between. Additionally, mutual masturbation isn't indicative of your sexuality—even though you both identify as straight men, if you and your roommate both consent to these mutual masturbation sessions, then you're doing nothing wrong and you have nothing to feel ashamed about. For many people, their sexual behaviors and their sexual identities don't align in ways that are societally expected, so it may cause confusion. You can both be straight, cis men who enjoy engaging in sexual behaviors with other men, but that ultimately doesn't change your sexual identity or attraction. 

However, considering the negative messages that many people receive about masturbation and being part of the LGBTQ+ communities, your questions are understandable. It may help to consider why you're concerned about masturbating with your roommate. Could your concern stem simply from guilt you feel about masturbation itself, whether it's alone or with someone else? Or, are you wondering whether you might now, or later, be bisexual, gay, or identify with another sexual identity at some point? What are your own thoughts around people who are part of LGBTQ+ communities, and how would it make you feel if you realized that your identity fit within one of those communities one day? You could also be wondering what your roommate and best friend thinks of your dual diddling; have you had a chance to discuss it with him? Once you're able to get to the root of why you feel the way you do, you'll be able to better manage the emotions that arise as you navigate your late-night sessions with your roommate.

As long as you and your roommate are comfortable with it, and it's not interfering with your responsibilities at school, work, or your other relationships, then you're good to go. Again, there is nothing wrong about consensually masturbating with your roommate. However, if you two decide to stop in the future, then that's ok as well. Whichever choice you decide to make, know that both of them are perfectly normal and healthy decisions.